Two-Minute Tuesday!

Grab two minutes to indulge in a drink  (like candy cane hot chocolate and whipped cream) from your most reliable coffee shop (good ole' Timmies for me). 

Reliable coffee shops always provide us with the things we need when we need it. Like coffee before an essay is due. They're there for us when other things, ahem, no-money-on-my-sbucks-card, aren't. 

Good friends are like reliable coffee shops. They are the listening ear and lending hand when things get tough. They also offer advice for a lower cost (than say, your extra espresso shot venti latte with three syrup flavours). 

So when you take two minutes today to think about what's a reliable coffee shop for you, consider how you can be a reliable coffee shop to others. 

Felicia 

#SundaySnack

Confession: This isn't really a snack but we love efficiency and it's Sunday and tea is, essentially, a liquid snack... So, try reusing your tea leaves, especially if you grabbed one scoop too many when you were making tea for yourself. 

Tea leaves can be used a few times, especially loose tea leaves that I've always found to be stronger than tea bags or sachets. 

Of course, this isn't a fact or anything just an experiment conducted safely in my kitchen with a little taste-testing. So don't take my word for it. But my grandpa always does this so, it must be a thing, right? 

Metaphor? Get the most out of what makes you happy. Like tea. Even if there's no scientific proof behind it. Or because you're on a student budget. Like me. 

Fresh Fruit Friday!

We're starting something new! Since expanding to a lifestyle blog, rather than just metaphors every single post, we're going to be sharing our favourite fresh fruits on Fridays, including recipes and creative ways to include fruit in your daily snacks. 

We love fresh fruit and we've heard that it's better to eat it in the morning, you know, before you go snacking on all the leftover Halloween candy. 

Not that we're professional dietitians or anything. 

But, we do know (think, believe, Wikipedia'd) that fresh fruit has more vitamins than dried fruit, so ditch your dried mangos (who likes those? It feels like chewing on someone's ear...) and grab some fresh fruit before you head out the door. Today, we're loving pomegranate and blackberries! 

We've also seen some cool new (okay it's been around for a while but like, new to us) pomegranate teas. Have you ever opened a tea sachet to see what's inside? But that's not fresh fruit so like, another post for another day. 

Happy Friday! 

The Bitter Tea Memory

You'll never forget that one time you drank bitter tea with a meal, then spent the entire night on the bathroom floor. And ever since then, you could never drink that one bitter flavour tea ever again, because it made you puke your guts.. bad memories.. (Well, the food probably did, but memory by association right?)

One of the things that conjures bad memories for me like the bad tea, and brings back that anxiety is passing a few girls from high school who instigated and were involved in the outrageous cyber and in-person bullying I experienced. Now before you close this post and assume its 'just another awareness-thing-and-personal-story-on-bullying' please know my focus, rather than raising awareness, although important, is to try and connect with you, my readers. (This is a heavy topic that is close to my heart and a very personal experience, which previously, I have only shared with my closest friends. Please respect my story, and my sharing of it, with only good intentions.) 

Unlike my previous posts, I offer no advice in this, except the following which I feel, though obvious, is necessary to say and is easier said than done: I regret that I didn't ask for help from a parent, teacher or someone with authority at the time, but my hope is that you do seek help, even if you think you can handle it yourself. We all have our time to be independent in due course, but this isn't a Superwoman-only problem. 

Back to bad memories. 

So I was 16 years old, "seeing" a guy before dating him, and the milestone was hit: someone returned my LIKE LIKE feelings after all those lonely years. Big deal for a teenage girl, #amiright? 

First, I was attacked online through Facebook messages, by his ex-girlfriend, his ex-rebound-hook-ups, and their friends. Wholly immature (C'mon, girls, grow up!), inappropriate, jealousy-driven, and unnecessary, but by this day and age, the cyber (online) bullying I faced was not as surprising as it should be for something so widely talked about and unaccepted. 

Second, it moved to in-person + online bullying. Blocking them on Facebook could stop the messages, but not their physical presence. Waiting around my locker or classrooms to talk about me and my new boyfriend, purposely trying to get on my nerves. Finding other ways to send messages fabricating stories about issues with him, which of course, scared the wits out of me. And I mean more scared than I am of scary movies. I was terrified of running into them every day. 

For a girl who could speak her mind since fourth grade without a care in the world, I had suddenly lost the words to stand up for myself. 

After two years of enduring this bullying throughout high school, university felt like the biggest relief to be freed of the torment. Bigger and better things, right?! I didn't realize it would follow me, despite the fact these girls were still in high school. Running into them at McDonald's, in the mall, I'd always think, "Yep, just my luck I'm running into them, even now." *sigh* 

Beyond the fact that these girls were originally associated with this boyfriend, even after he and I were no longer together, passing them in the mall or at the grocery store by chance still inflicts the anxiety and fear from over 5 years ago. 

To this day. 

What makes me sad is that even now, talking about it, writing about it, just like bringing up the bad, bitter tea memory, I realize it is an important part of my teenage years that I have not yet overcome. It still bothers me. I can't seem to let go of it yet. My stomach still drops, my heart beat is still too fast, and my chest is too constricted in fear for me to know if I have forgiven them yet. 

Maybe talking about it will help me work through these bad memories, and find it in me to forgive and look past the bullying I endured. Maybe it won't happen for a while. Maybe, sharing my story will help me see that I was the 'bigger person' by not reciprocating. But am I? 

I do know this: The "Mean Girls" world is very, very real. And that's not a good thing. And having the perspective to see the terrifying truth of this in my twenties now, I think it scares me most thinking about how long and how far girls will go to break the heart and soul of those whom they are jealous.

If you haven't experienced this it may sound like I'm making a mountain or of a molehill, something common that every teenage girl goes through. But if you have experienced something similar, you'll know it's a molehill that IS an unavoidable mountain, that constantly impedes on your life, and it shouldn't be common, accepted, or overlooked. 

Metaphor: Bad tea by association leaves you with a bitter taste in your mouth, but one day you will be able to break the association and leave those memories in the past. And enjoy your tea. I believe that one day I will reach the point that I can pass those girls, and though I won't forget, I will not have the same reactions (the tea's bitter taste) as I once did. 

I haven't figured out how, but in the meantime, I'll add a little sugar to my tea and focus on the things that I love and make me feel loved, not worrying about the bitter bullies of the past. 

Felicia 

xx